They wanted to feel valued as a man — and I was always more than ready with the right words. I’d arrive early — looking perky — to have that valuable 30 minutes of chat with the guy who controlled my wages and the path my career took.
It paid off — I went from job to job, with a salary increase each time.
I’m easy on the eye — and I use it to my advantage every single day.
Before you roll your eyes in disgust and write me off as a shameless gold digger, little better than a WAG, consider this.
While you might be thinking I’m little better than a prostitute, I’d argue that’s far from the case.
Dr Hakim says erotic capital has real value in the job market and refers to countless studies which back this up. Platonic male friends were full of admiration when they clocked how my career and salary soared above theirs.
Why anyone else wouldn’t behave as I did is beyond me. As for my girlfriends, in shared moments over a bottle of wine, when alcohol had paved way for confession time, I discovered a perhaps not-so-surprising thing.
One girlfriend regularly re-adjusts her bra before going into a meeting with her male boss. My then-husband couldn’t cope with my success or with the fact I paid so much attention to nurturing my relationship with the right bosses. I’d put friendships on the backburner while in pursuit of the man or woman with the bigger, better job prospects. When you step over that line you move away from the sisterhood and your peers.
Such conversations are never restricted to a restaurant; on transatlantic flights, in an elevator, even at a Pilates class — you grab every opportunity to trade on your erotic capital in order to benefit your own lot in life.But they were primarily interested in each other; their bosses were rarely on their radar.Typically a generation older than me and my peers, our bosses wanted someone to listen to them moan about their wives or kids.Yet another female co-worker let it be known in every professional encounter with a man — whether job interview or formal meeting — that she had once worked as a Playboy bunny. He would comment on my appearance when I left the house each morning, awkwardly joking that I made more of an effort for my employers than I did for him. Of course I did — I’d argue most women do this, too. Happily married for three years, I’m sexually attentive to my husband and in return I know I can splurge in the Mac make-up store or online at net-a-porter without guilt — I don’t have to justify or even hide my purchases.It hasn’t always been easy to marry this strategy in my home and professional life. I exercise daily, use anti-ageing creams and am mindful about what I eat.
Unsurprisingly, he always frees-up my preferred spot.